Maria is a 25 year old nurse from North Carolina. Recently divorced, she is a single mother of two. A boomerang {boo-muh-rang} is a curved wooden stick made in Austrailia. When it is thrown, it returns to the person who threw it. How is Maria relevant to a stick from down under?

Me and Maria dated for a few months and later became a couple. It was a beautiful thing we had going. Then everything shifted. I begin to notice a change in her. We no longer had sex. The look in her eye wasnt the same. Her kisses were emotionless. Her touch was now cold. She didn’t love me anymore. She had regressed to sleeping with her ex husband and the father of her kids. Her heart belonged to him. The same man who cheated on her and had an extra baby on the side. At the time, she had decided she was fed up with him and was moving on. See every time Maria tried to throw her baby’s daddy away, he just kept coming back. Just like that boomerang.

I will never understand how a woman can justify maintaining a relationship with a guy after confessing to me all the bullshit he put you through. After the pain and heartbreak as a result of his lieing, cheating, and physical beatings; how can you justify going back? When you have a good honest man who adores you and loves you unconditionally; why be unfaithful and cheat on him with the father of your kids. Ex lovers are exes for a reason. Let go of the past and focus on creating a bright future. How can you find someone who is going make you happy if you’re stuck on someone that’s proven to only cause pain?

They always have the same excuse. The same line derived from the same script. “You don’t understand!”. No I don’t understand. True I don’t have kids and have exactly zero comprehension of the bond between a man a woman who parented children together. But what I do know is if the bond was that great; you would still be together. He would be your husband and not carry the Baby Daddy title. What puzzles me is the fact that some act like I should just accept the fact that she is gonna screw her baby’s daddy from time to time.

It’s like a bad movie or reoccurring nightmare. I hope it will be different every time but always has the same tragic ending.  Why is it that every single girl that I get myself involved with has the exact same defect? I am cursed by the Baby Daddy Boomerang. The never-ending saga.


Yours Truly,

Cruz D’ville



  1. I know many who are still shaking their heads on this one. Let’s face it, as strong as women are they can be extremely weak when it comes to the opposite sex. When leaving a relationship some women, myself included can be rather timid when getting back into the world of dating. Honestly, it’s scary. Sometimes for fear of rejection or fear of failing at yet another relationship you get caught back up in what’s familiar. You can be scared to deal with the unknown so you deal with what you know because you already know what to expect.
    When kids are involved the dynamic because even more complex. Most parents would prefer to raise their children in a home that consist of both their biological mother and father. I know from experience that it is hard to give up the idea of a happy family so sometimes you put up with more than you’d like. You can make up your mind that you’re ready to leave but looking at your children and hearing their longing for family can tug at anyone’s heartstrings. Thankfully, some of us get over that quicker than others.
    I would say don’t get involved with a woman until she has spent ample time out of the relationship. If any man or women has not given themselves enough time to mentally and emotionally move on for their last long term relationship then they probably won’t be the ideal mate for you. If any woman is really ready to move on with her life, she will take the time to figure out who she is and what she wants before moving on to the next relationship. JMO

  2. I have seen this to often and always wonder why some women go back. When my child’s father and I split up, there was no going back for me. It was a mess when I was there so I didn’t feel the need to double back. However, I can agree with Mahogany, it can be scary trying to get back out there. I’ve been over him for years, but the fear of rejection keeps me from really dating anyone. The unknown for anyone, especially when meeting someone new after a break-up, can be a little uneasy.
    Would I have preferred to raise my child with both parents in the home, of course. But when I think about how I grew up having both parents in the home, I would not want to put my child through that emotional instability.
    If someone comes at you with that excuse “You just don’t understand”, just say you don’t and walk away. You can tell if the other person is still going back to the ex especially if there are some unresolved feelings lingering. If they haven’t taken enough time to heal, it will show up sooner rather than later.

    • I just dont get it! Yall dont how many times I have dealt with this. I mean its one thing if you and your kids father are cool and he is a good father and he didnt do anything wrong. But when you constantly tell me how dude aint shit. How he cheats and beats you and doesnt do shit for the kids. And you go back. Wtf?!? And they always tell me they wud never go back but always do.

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